On this guest episode of the pod, Carolina had the chance to sit down with her fiancé, Pedro. They talked all things healthy relationships, their own relationship story + answered some questions that the community sent in! This was such a cute episode and as listeners, we had the chance to hear about Carolina and Pedro's love story and how they maintain their own relationship! I took away some amazing tips to bring into my own life + hope you guys did as well!!
What are your priorities?
In the beginning of the episode Carolina and Pedro touched on the topic of priorities and how to be flexible in your relationship. They stressed the importance of understanding what your partner prioritzes and supporting them even if it's something that you don't prioritize yourself. Pedro had a great idea of creating a list with your partner and rating your personal priorities and comparing them with each other. It's a great way to talk through what your non-negotiables are and things you would love to have your partner join you in doing. For example, Carolina loves working out, and at this moment, Pedro doesn't prioritize it daily, but he knows how important it is to Carolina, and he makes the effort to join her when he can, because it makes her happy. Sometimes you have to compromise to make your partner happy! They also spoke on the idea of being flexible, and understanding that your partner will change throughout the relationship. They brought up Carolina's strict eating habits, and how when they first started dating it was something they had to work through together and navigate, but as time went on, she personally healed her relationship to food and now it's something that isn't even brought up often. Pedro understood that for that time being, he had to support Carolina and not add stress into her life, but as time went on, this dynamic shifted and they now don't have to have difficult conversations around food and worked through that hard time together!
Where it all started!
In the next segment, we got a closer look into the story of Carolina and Pedro's love. They spoke about how their parents met when they were younger and ended up going to college together and stayed friends! For years they both lived all over the place, maybe only seeing each other once or twice a year but when Covid struck, they both ended up in Florida, back with their families. Carolina joked that growing up Pedro was always her crush and how excited she would get when he was at family functions, so when they started Dm'ing each other, she didn't know what to think! At this time, Carolina was going through her own inner growth journey, so they didn't talk too regularly, but one day they finally decided to hang out alone together for the first time. They spent the entire day at the beach and never wanted the day to end. Finally, at the end of the day, Pedro kissed Carolina and she said after that moment, she knew nothing would ever be the same. Unfortunately, she was considering going back to college and was going to leave soon. So, 4 days after their first kiss, Pedro asked Carolina out again. He knew he couldn't do long distance with them not being official, so he asked her to be his girlfriend! Carolina ended up staying in Florida until after graduation and then decided to move to New York. They had the chance to spend more time together and talk about their future and how they were going to work through long distance.
The key to long distance
They both knew how hard it was going to be having a long distance relationship, but emphaized how important it is to have something to look forward to. Pedro said the key to conquering long distance, is to always know when you are going to see each other next and I 100% agree with this! I started dating my boyfriend from South Africa and we were long distance for 1.5 years before I finally moved here to Cape Town. The only way we were able to keep the faith that we would one day be with each other for the long term, was always knowing when the next trip was. I could never leave not knowing when I would see him next. They also mentioned the importance of communication and talking daily. When you aren't with your partner or living in the same area, it's very easy to over think situations, so it's very important to communicate your fears, when you're feeling down, or when you need some extra support. Long distance can be hard, but it also helps to create a very stable relationship!
moving in together
A lot of listeners wanted to know the challenges of moving in/ living with your significant other. Pedro and Carolina talked about the positives and the challenges of this big step! They knew that it made sense to live together financially and in their personal relationship, but that didn't mean that there wouldn't be challenges. They both spoke on the importance of giving the other person space and knowing when your partner needs space. Another point they made was to respect each other doing their own thing and wanting the other to have something that they enjoy doing on their own! However, prioritizing quality time is also huge!
Prioritizing quality time
It can be very easy to become comfortable in a relationship and that's normal! But try to find ways to spice things up with romantic nights out or little date nights. Try to find things that you can do together that are new and exciting, but that doesn't mean you can't have your nights on the couch either. Find the balance within your relationship!
knowing when they're the one
Lastly, they spoke about their engagement and how they knew each other was the one! They told their engagement story and how magical it was in Spain. A point that Carolina made that stuck with me was, that some couples think they need to have everything figured out before getting engaged/married but they knew they wanted to figure things out together and that's how they knew they were ready for the next step! I think this is so important, we don't always have to have everything settled or figured out in order to take the next step, sometimes you have to have a little faith and know that you and your partner can support each other through the hard times and come out on the other side!
xo
Michaela
If you want to listen to more and hear the specific Q&A questions that were asked, listen here or watch on YouTube!!
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